888-69-KELLY
Gwen
888 69 KELLY  ext 7408

Biker Bar

Apr 20, 2021

A biker walks into a bar and sits down on a bar stool near the end of the bar. He takes a look at the menu and it reads as follows: Hamburger – 2.99 Cheeseburger – 3.99 Chicken Sandwich – 4.99 Hand Jobs – 19.99 The crusty old biker waves the bartende...

Doctor and Wife....Second Opin

Mar 06, 2021

A doctor and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either," and storms out of the house. After sometime he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and calls home. She comes to the phone after...

Home for The Holiday's

Dec 09, 2020

Hey there Guy's, I've been gone so long. I've missed you all so badly ! It just doesn't feel like the holiday's without you in my life. So, here I am. I'm hoping to speak to all my special one's before the New Year . Now that would truley make my holi...

Sometimes.....

Jul 30, 2020

A women just wants to be bent over a banged like a screen door in a huricaine.

WIFE WAS CLEANING 12 YEAR OLDS

Jul 04, 2020

IT'S All IN THE FANTASY !

May 23, 2020

WINE AND ORGIES

May 23, 2020

More Than Safe Sex........

Mar 20, 2020

Durging these crazy times, Phone sex and masterbation may be the only way to stay virus free. So cum with me... we can nasty, dirty and still stay safe.

Someday's

Feb 27, 2020

You just need a hug on the butt.....with a paddle ! Mistress ~Gwen ~

Hey Guy's.....

Feb 20, 2020

I'm Back ! Did You Miss Me ? I Missed You !

5 Ways For A Man To Be Happy..

Jul 22, 2019

(1) Be with a women who makes you laugh.(2) Be with a women who gives you her time.(3) Be with a women who makes you horny.(4) Be with a women who takes care of you.(5) Finally, make sure these four women don't know each other.

There's No Place I'd Rather Be

Jul 19, 2019

Than tangled in the sheet's with you.

I'm Well Aware......

Jul 19, 2019

I'm not everyone's cup of tea ..... I'd rather be someone's shot of Tequila anyway.

Wouldn't it be funny.....

Jul 18, 2019

To secretly place a sex toy in someone else's yard sale, then stand back and watch the reactions.

Alpha Females.....

Jul 13, 2019

Don't run in packs.

Let's lay in bed all day....

Jul 13, 2019

and trade sexual favors for trips to the fridge.

Little Johnny.......

Jul 09, 2019

Dad, why do people hang horse's ? Dad : " Know body hangs horse's son " He consoled him."Who told you that Johnny? "Johnny: I just heard mommy on the phone saying that her new boss is hung like a horse ! "

A Fool Proof 3 Step Plan .....

Jun 29, 2019

Two keep a good man..... Suck his cock right..... Make him a sandwich...… And shut the fuck up once in a while.

All You Need.....

Jun 10, 2019

Is someone who see's the crazy in you and wants you anyway.....That would be me.

With The Right Person......

Jun 10, 2019

There is no such thing as inappropriate behavior .

Butt Plugs....

Jun 04, 2019

Are all fun and games...….. Until you fart and shoot the cat ! :(

All She Wants .......

May 22, 2019

to hear is that { You Want Her } ……… All He Wants to hear is { His Balls Slapping Against Your Ass.}

Women Find Funny Men Sexy ~

May 22, 2019

If you can make a women laugh, you're almost there ……… If you're almost there and than she laughs ……….. That's a different story ~

~ MY PET .........

May 20, 2019

I want to take you like you have never been taken, to leave you unable to think, only feel and be lost in the moment to lose yourself and to reach heights like never before while gripping me tight.

MEN ARE....

Apr 21, 2019

A lot like infants.....If you want to shut them up..... Put your boobs in their mouth.

Hey Whiny Little Dick,

Apr 06, 2019

If I offended you...…..Cry me a river. I'll bring snacks and a raft ….. I will literally float down your tears, eating chip's and working on my tan.

Bad Boy ......Bad Boy ........

Mar 24, 2019

What You Gonna Do........When they cum for you.

Some Days You Just .........

Mar 11, 2019

Have to create your own orgasms, OOPS ! I meant Sunshine ! Yeah, sunshine.

Some Days You Got To .........

Mar 11, 2019

Make your own orgasms. I mean Sunshine, Some days you got to make your own sunshine.

I'll Give You....

Mar 02, 2019

Sex so good you can feel it when you think about it !

IF YOU HAVE TO .....

Feb 17, 2019

Check your surroundings before you open your photo gallery in public...… You're my kind of people !

You Remind Me Of My Pinky Toe

Feb 11, 2019

Sooner or later, I'm going to bang you on a table !

" His Kiss ......

Feb 11, 2019

Awakened the beast in me after tasting wild. I'd never be tame again. " ~N.R. Hart

My Mind ..............

Jan 30, 2019

Is a dirty place...… And L love having you visit.

You Can Tell How Much ........

Jan 29, 2019

A women likes you by her feet. If they are behind her ears. She likes you a lot ! :)

Which sounds classier ?

Jan 28, 2019

Gangbang or orgy? I'm updating my Christen Mingle profile,

Bury Yourself So Deep Inside..

Aug 22, 2018

Me ...... That I feel hollow when you are not with me.

The Right Way To Kiss A Women~

Aug 22, 2018

Is to push her up against the wall and kiss her like you fucking mean it !

It Takes A Strong Man.......

Aug 19, 2018

To be a submissive .

May Your Weekend............

Aug 19, 2018

Be filled with inappropriate behavior and fun !

What's The Difference ........

Aug 13, 2018

Between Light and Hard ? You can go to sleep with a light on.

Never Look Down On Someone....

Aug 08, 2018

Unless you're getting head.

The Longer The Foreplay.......

Aug 08, 2018

The Stronger The Orgasm !

If You're Kinky..........

Jul 22, 2018

And you know it...……….Clap your …….Oh, they're tied ? Nevermind.

I'm Not Saying..........

Jun 10, 2018

I did kinky things last night but, Satan woke up on my couch this morning and won't make eye contact with me.

SPUNCKING.....................

Jun 09, 2018

(V) : action; When spooning turns into fucking.

If You Are Going To Call......

May 30, 2018

The cops every time you spot me hiding in the bushes to see you.....I don't think this relationship is going to work out.

I've Been Asked To Join ......

May 30, 2018

A swingers club, but I'm a little nervous. What if I'm not good enough ? I haven't been on a swing since I was 10.

If You Rub A Kiwi Fruit ......

May 30, 2018

With one hand and rub one of your testicles with the other, it's difficult to tell the difference.It also get's you banned from Walmart.

I Was Beaten By A Women.......

May 28, 2018

in an elevator yesterday, I was staring at her boobs and then she said "Please press one". I guess I misunderstood ?

You Know The Sex Is Good .....

May 19, 2018

When it sounds like you're running in flip flops !

When Someone Say's To Me......

May 14, 2018

Great minds think a like, I just look at them and think, "You Dirty Bastard".

Unspoken Rules Of Sex......

May 12, 2018

Sex Is Like Vacuming .........

May 12, 2018

Hopefully it's loud, involves lots of sucking and it's best if you do it in every room of the house, often !

According To Recent Studies...

May 04, 2018

Blowjobs are the healthiest breakfast, as it comes with sausage, 2 nuts and, a protein shot. Stay healthy ! Suck a dick.

You Can........

Apr 20, 2018

Love me, hate me or masturbate screaming my name........It's the thought that counts !

When.........

Apr 09, 2018

A man truly submits to the right women.......Good things happen !

Never Hesitate.....

Apr 06, 2018

To discover my body.....There is no curve of me that doesn't deserve to be caressed, nibbled on, spanked or kissed......Do not be afraid of my body.......Worship me.

I Missed You !

Mar 30, 2018

I took a few weeks off to ride up and down the west cost on my Harley and I had a great time !But, all that rumbling between my legs has left me as horny as hell ! So, I am logged on and ready to get freaky with my favorite callers ! I hope you missed me too ! Give me a call over the Easter holiday...

It May Be Between Your Legs...

Mar 16, 2018

But. IT BELONGS TO ME ! Understand ?

I Wish......

Mar 11, 2018

More of my handcuff stories involved sex instead of police officers.

I Always Wanted To.......

Mar 05, 2018

Lay naked on a bear skin rug in front of a fireplace...........Evidently, Cracker Barrel has a policyagainst this.

Mom Help.......

Feb 26, 2018

~ TITS ~

Feb 24, 2018

They beat Rock....Paper....and.....Scissors EVERY TIME !

Lead Us.......

Feb 19, 2018

Not into temptation.... Just tell us where it is.....and we'll find it !

They Grow Up So Quickly !!

Feb 18, 2018

You Know You Love......

Feb 17, 2018

Hair Pulling.....

Feb 17, 2018

Not Just For Preschoolers !!

Never Let Your Man.....

Feb 04, 2018

Leave the house hungry or horny .......Because somewhere out there is a whore with sandwiches !

Persuade Me......

Feb 03, 2018

I'm dying to try something so naughty..... because, I'm dying to be.........so naughty !

If You're Kinky......

Feb 03, 2018

And you know it...... clap your .......Oh, they're tired ? Never mind.

Somedays.......

Feb 03, 2018

You just need a hug.....On the butt, with a paddle.

Police matter.

Feb 03, 2018

Cop: "Turn around." Me: "Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you never come around."Cop: "TURN AROUND ! Me: "Every now......"* gets tased *

Doctors Visit .......

Jan 24, 2018

My friend went to the doctors the other day at his wife's request and found out that their new family Dr. is a young female and drop dead gorgeous ! He was embarrassed but she said " don't worry I'm a professional... .. I've seen it all before,...just tell me what's wrong and I'll check it out".He...

~ Fuck Lust ~ (verb)

Jan 23, 2018

An insatiable sexual desire to fuck the hell out of that certain special someone you think about all the time.

Whenever Someone Says To Me...

Jan 09, 2018

" Oh, you look so familiar, where do I know you from ?"I like to respond with " Do you watch porn ? "

My Advise......

Jan 09, 2018

Do more of what lights your soul on fire ~ Keep that flame burning hot !

More ~Words To Live By........

Jan 09, 2018

Live fast, have fun and be a bit mischievous !!